Anguish
by WannabeWerewolf
Summary: As Remus grieves, he has recieved a final message, as Dumbledore comforts him. One shot Fic


Disclaimer:If it was mine, I wouldnt have killed Sirius off *sniff*  
  
Anguish  
  
Remus Lupin sat huddled in his armchair. Crumpled and hurt, Remus brought his knees to his chest and held in that position. A hurt, shrunken, pain filled man. Remus' body shook with held back sobs. To shelter himself from his atmosphere, Remus threw his arms over his head and rocked back and forth in the armchair, trying to contain his sobs.  
  
Gone...  
  
Gone...  
  
James and Lily were gone...  
  
And now Sirius was gone...  
  
Who did Remus have now?  
  
"Sirius...Sirius... why don't you return?" Remus whispered, pleading and begging in his arms. "Why Sirius? Why?! Why did you leave me just like that?!"   
  
Remus clenched his hands in anguish and flet himself pulling his hair. His curled up body (similar to a wolf sheltering from a storm) shook, convulsioning as if he had a seizure. With a cry of grief, Remus felt hot tears cascade down his thin face at last. His greying hair was plastered to his face. His bangs fell into his glassy hazel eyes, which were filled with a degree of pain not shown in 14 years.  
  
"Sirius! Sirius Black!"  
  
Remus froze, and slowly, very slowly, looked up, bloodshot wet eyes peering inbetween his fingers. That anxious voice was not his own one. Remus' own voice was hoarse and weak from crying and whimpering.  
  
Slowly, Remus lifted his head and uncurled his shaking body. His usually alert eyes darted around the room in 12 Grimmauld Place as he heard the voice again. More persistant and pained. It seemed like ages more than several seconds as Remus unculred his legs from beneath him and slowly reached out a trembling hand to the mirror on the table where he heard the noise.   
  
The mirror was propped up. A beacon of light to Sirius it seemed. Slowly, through misty eyes, Remus picked up the mirror in trembling hands and peered onto the surface.  
  
Harry's anxious, pain ridden face was there, desperatly calling Sirius' name  
  
Gently, Remus lifted a trembling hand and stroked the mirrored surface.   
  
"James..." he murmured as two tears cascaded down his face  
  
"James... why aren't you calling my name?" Remus whispered into the mirror. "Sirius...Oh James!" he sobbed out "James! I'm sorry!" Remus shrieked, not noticing the mirror went suddenly dark.  
  
He buried his face in his hands, as the mirror he was holding fell to the ground and smashed. Remus fell back to his chair, face in hands, and curled up again, sobbing, sounding strangely like a lone howling wolf.  
  
Outside of Remus' hearing, there was a woosh of someone who just traveled by Floo powder, and the quiet footsteps which approached the room where Remus was curled up in his chair, bawling as softly as he could.  
  
The footsteps quietly approached Remus and stopped in front of him. In the ocean of Remus' grief he felt a hand clasp his shoulder, and another on the top of his head.  
  
"Shh... Remus...its O.K..."  
  
Startled, Remus flung his head up, to see who uttered those words of comfort, and looked into clear blue eyes behind half moon glasses.  
  
"D-Dumbledore..." Remus whispered. His eyes widened considerably as they filled with fresh tears. Dumbledore looked over Remus' hurt, teary face sadly and brushed Remus' bangs out of his eyes. He bent down to be level with Remus' face and squeezed his shoulder sympathetically. "Remus...I am so terribly sorry for your loss..."  
  
Flinching, Remus pulled away from Dumbledore as much as he could, and wound his body into a tighter ball, wolf-like. He jerked up to look at Dumbledore. Through his own misty eyes, he saw tears at the corner of Dumbledore's eyes. Remus shook his head, wincing, as though he tried to dissapear into the armchair. He didn't need Albus Dumbledores sympathy. Dumbledore removed his hand from the top of Remus' head and stood, his head bowed. He put down a folded piece of paper onto the coffee table. "I have to return to school Remus." Dumbledore turned to look at Remus, who looked at him through his fingers, hair disheveled and shaking with grief. "Sirius left you something"  
  
Without another word, Dumbledore quietly walked out of the room and toward the fire-place, who nodded at Snape walking past the doorway Remus was in. Snape peered into the room, and saw Remus huddled and hicupping in the armchair. Fighting hard not to say anything, he strode past the room and ignored it.  
  
Slowly, trembling, Remus reached for the paper that Dumbledore left, and brought it up to his glassy weary eyes, and flipped it open.  
  
Remus read:  
  
Moony!   
  
I would have sent this ALOT quicker, but (a) I couldn't find your address (b) Dumbledore wasn't around here when I wrote it, so he could make sure it wouldnt be intercepted (c) That damn Kreacher took this letter so many times but I got it away. Ha ha!  
  
Could you do a favor for your dear old friend Padfoot? When your up at Hogwarts again for Dumbledore could you tell Harry he is welcome to stay here for the summer? I already managed to get a letter out to the muggles. Why don't you stay too? The more the merrier! And you could help with the infestation of this weird kind of pixi in the attic. I can't. You were always good at getting rid of pests anyhow.   
  
I would ask Dumbledore to do it, but I noticed Harry was acting, well, testy around him. Probably cause of Dumbledore not talking to Harry much. So could ya do it please? If you do, I'll get you some licorice wands. I know you cant resist that. And anyway, Harry likes you the most. Feel special Moony  
  
~Padfoot  
  
Remus let out a watery laugh, and folded the letter and placed it in his robes.  
  
"I feel special Padfoot"  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~~*~~*~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~~*~~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*  
  
Feh. I was so annoyed at the end of OoTp I had to vent somehow. And I seem to like Lupin angst. You can flame me, thats allright ;-) But you dont want to know the original story, oh no! My friends made me write how Snape comforted Remus. It kinda creeped me out. lol.  
  
*cries* I miss Sirius!!!!!  
  
~Yami LinkMaster~ 


End file.
